Ethical Massage Etiquette: What to Wear During a Massage

Q: How undressed do I have to be to get a massage? 

A: As undressed as you feel comfortable being, from full nudity under the drape to wearing all of your clothes 

If you’ve never had a massage before, you might be wondering what to wear during a massage or what is proper massage etiquette. But all massage clients, whether visiting for relaxation or injury treatment, must feel safe, secure, and comfortable, and all ethical massage therapists will tell you to only undress to your level of comfort.  

The Levels of Undressing Comfort During a Massage  

The norms for the level of undressing comfort during a massage vary greatly between countries and with the type of massage being performed. Some types of massage, like Shiatsu or chair massage, require you to leave all or most of your clothing on. With other kinds of massage and bodywork, you can remove most or all your clothing. For the latter type of massage, in the United States and Canada, many clients choose to leave at least their undergarments on.  

 

    

 

Therapists will usually say, ” Undress to your level of comfort.” However, some clients feel pressure, whether from an unethical therapist or their own internal pressure, to remove more clothing than they are comfortable with. However, you should never remove more clothing than you want to. In North America, a professional and ethical massage therapist would never ask you to take off all your clothing or remove your underwear.  

Pressure to Remove Your Underwear is a Red Flag  

If a therapist suggests that you remove your underwear, this is a red flag which means they are a poorly trained therapist, who has a lack of understanding of personal boundaries, or they are a sexual predator getting ready to test your limits and either groom or assault you. Leave immediately. 

No one should pressure you or shame you into doing something that makes you uncomfortable. Everyone’s personal boundaries about their bodies differ. We live in a culture where sexual misconduct is common. In the United States, distortions of a woman’s sexuality are used to sell everything from clothes to magazines to cars. These product advertisements often dehumanize women in the process. So, it is reasonable to be careful who you choose to touch your body in a private setting, and it is completely rational to want the private parts of your body covered when being massaged by a relative stranger. 

 Some therapists tell their clients to leave their underwear on, while others explain the choices more fully. For example, “Please undress to your comfort level. It’s fine if you want to leave your underwear on. Many clients do. The important thing is that you feel totally comfortable.” 

 Massage can easily be performed with your underwear on. If you want the gluteus muscles in the buttocks massaged, the therapist can either work over the sheet or ask permission to lower your underwear, one side at a time, to work directly on the skin. This area has important muscles that often strain and accumulate tension. Only have this part of your body massaged if you are comfortable with it – ethical massage therapists will discuss the areas you’d like massaged before the massage starts. 

     

 Cultural Norms 

In some cultures, the norm is to be completely naked for a massage; in other cultures, it’s not. In some cultures, a man would never massage a woman; in others, a woman would never massage a man. Whatever you are comfortable with is what you should do.